We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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