ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'm like, not good at living.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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