I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
