Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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