He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
