the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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