Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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