My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
