New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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