By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
