so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
