you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
