Do you still have your period?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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