found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Randomize