Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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