Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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