Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
