My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I am spending my child support on dildos
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
operation have a gay friend backfired
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
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