He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
