Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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