so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
