I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
