your thong is hanging out like whoa
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
