I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
handjob tips. give me some.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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