bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize