As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Randomize