We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
