i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
