So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
