Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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