I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize
