Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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