is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
