If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
