dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
