so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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