yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
