I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
