Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I'm sobbing to NWA
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
