Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize