ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Randomize
