Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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