Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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