I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
