2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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