the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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