I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
