On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize