in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
