hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Still dying that you shit outside
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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