Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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